Undead To Rise Again This Friday

Predictably, this Friday the 31st of October will once again see the return of the undead. Ghosts, ghouls and spooks are also expected to make an appearance on our earthly plane. Opinion is divided on this issue. Though they were here first, the living now have the run of the place and I for one, am sick and tired of spirits hanging around my house on Halloween. I don’t care that you lived and died in this house, I pay the rent now, get off my lawn. Worse still are the zombies. We will all be familiar with the scent of rotting flesh and the moan of “brrraaaaiiiinsss” lifting on the wind and, frankly, I find it very unpleasant. If you must be decomposing and wailing this Halloween, please think of others and stay in one area. Perhaps Wales, it’s time the Welsh took one for the team.
I am aware they have just this one night and some will say I’m being too hard on them, perhaps the slur, “party-pooper,” may even be mentioned. But just think; if we give them this with no fight at all, what’s next? The 31st of EVERY month? Even those months that only last 20-something days? Then weekly? Daily? No, it’s time someone took a stand and drew the line. And I am willing to do that. Anyone who appears to be less than 100% alive (I’m sorry, senior citizens, you’re just too close to undead for comfort) and knocking on my door will get quite the shock! Legally, I’m no longer allowed to leave my home on Halloween (I swear officer, I thought they were devils, not 6 year olds) but rest assured, my curtains will be twitching and my fist will be shaking at these shenanigans. I’ll see you on the other side.

Tags: Halloween, Undead, Zombies